Living as an expatriate can sometimes seem so very happy and exciting all the time, nobody rarely mentions homesickness.
Especially in spring I miss Finland very, very much. Not so much that I would like to move back, but enough to notice that tiny little ache inside. Spring because it’s the time when everything awakes. I lived 19 years on the countryside, and I grew up with nature next to me, living the changes in the seasons.
Before spring comes you wait and wait and wait for the long dark hard winter to end, and it feels like it never will. Then one morning you wake up, you go out and you smell it. Spring. There is a different smell in the air when spring has arrived, and there is nothing like it. There might still be snow on the ground, but the sun is shining, snow is melting and dripping from the roofs, and there is that magic smell. That is what hope smells like.
If you live on the countryside you soon start noticing the birds. In winter there are only owls and poor little birds who bravely stay and fight the winter. But then one day you see the first swans flying over you, you hear them already from a distance. And how silly it might seem it moves you.
At some point, on a sunny day you take a walk and you feel the sun warm on your skin. You stop, you close your eyes and you disappear into that moment for a while.
You notice the days becoming longer and longer, daylight lingers and doesn’t want to leave. You walk home late at night and the sun is setting, birds are singing and it’s all magic.
There is something so beautiful, emotional and incredibly touching in the air in spring in my home country, I haven’t experienced it for many years now and I miss it so much.